23.11.04

Holy Grilled Cheese!

Dear Diary,

I read a story in the news today about a lady who saw the Virgin Mary's face in her grilled cheese, so she kept it in a box next to her bed for 10 years until she sold it on Ebay for $28,000. This has raised some serious philisophical questions for me.

1. How does she know it was the Virgin Mary's face and not, say, Britney Spears' face? Are they really that different?

2. If this were, in fact, a holy grilled cheese, wouldn't God want her to eat it? Or maybe give it to a homeless person?

3. If Mother Mary were sending this woman a message through the grilled cheese, I doubt that message was, "Hey, why don't you pimp me out for $28,000."

4. When I think, "Which sandwich would be a holy sandwich?" grilled cheese is not the one that comes to mind. Granted, I love grilled cheese and I hope that they are abundantly available in heaven. But I think the turkey club inspires more reverence. What sandwich would God use to send a message? Definitely the turkey club.

5. I'm going to pay a LOT more attention to my sandwiches from now on.

Love, Fluffy