All My Boyfriends

Dear Diary,

The Hawaiian shirts are out in full force today at Company V. And the shorts, oh God the shorts. It being Friday, we are allowed to wear shorts. And let me tell you, people do. It's like they're just dying to wear shorts. I don't understand this. Even I look bad in shorts.

I want to give you a list of my current boyfriends.

* Martin O'Malley (always)
* Johnny Damon (of the Red Sox. He is brave for being the only long-haired bearded man in baseball. He don't give a fuck. And he is a stone cold, caveman hottie.)
* John Kerry's 2 sons (they just joined the list last night)
* John Edwards (pretty cute except for the bad hair and the fat wife)

Hmmm. Three politicians on my list. I'm not sure I like that. I'll have to expand my search for boyfriends. I won't look to entertainment; that's so tired. Yeah, Jude Law is hot. So what? That's what he gets paid for. It's more impressive for a baseball player to be hot. You don't have to be hot to play baseball. Was that a Prince song?