Today they sent around this email at our company saying we got some certification or whatever, and to celebrate there would be cake in one of the large conference rooms. So my co-worker asked if I wanted to join her on a cake-ing expedition and I was all, no thanks, I just had lunch and I really don't want to be that pregnant woman who's fat from eating cake constantly (I didn't say that, but you get the idea). No no, I'm just fine with no cake.
So then about a half hour passed, and I was thinking about how every single night after dinner I look over at the BHE while we are watching jeopardy and I say, "Do you have any cake? Cake of any kind?" Of course he never does, so I try to satisfy the craving with soy ice cream and maybe one cookie instead. How lame is that, when I really want cake? I deserve an effing piece of cake, I decided. I've only gained 8 pounds, my ass is still its normal size so why shouldn't I have some cake? So I went up to the conference room to get some cake, confident that I deserved it and very very excited to eat it.
And it was all gone.