Dear Diary,

And so begins another married holiday season, with the travel and the in-laws, and the monkeys and the biting.

It seems we're in very high demand for Thanksgiving this year. Se we've (well, I've) developed a simple test on which to base our choice of family gathering: Which one will have more booze? Since my sister-in-law assured me that she is bringing a case of wine to my family's gathering (thank you, Brother, for marrying an Irish Catholic) we're opting for that one. I just can't trust the BHE's family to come through with enough booze for these things. Once we start hosting our own, this won't be a problem. But just I can't risk it. True, the BHE's mother is a better cook than my mother (Sorry, Mom). But you have to set your priorities straight when it comes to the holidays, yes?

In other news, two more of our friends jumped aboard the married train, so congratulations to Couple Y! I'm not one to dole out marital advice, but if, while working on some wiring, your husband yells up from the basement, "Let me know if something explodes!" run away from the light fixtures. He'll figure it out on his own if something explodes.

Love, Fluffy

Stonecold Caveman Hottie

i heart johnny damon

Thanks.

Dear Deli up the Street,

I get it. The crabmeat in your crab soup is real. You certainly don't have to leave the claws in to prove it. Those are better left behind the scenes, in my opinion.

Dear Everyone,

Are we done with saying "bling" now? Because the only people who use it are reporters on the red carpet: "Wow, that's some serious bling you got goin' on there." It is soooo 2000.

Love, Fluffy

Great Debate

Dear Diary,

Here is my commentary on the presidential debate.

1. Neither candidate mentioned robots. I found that rather disappointing and, quite frankly, irresponsible.

2. Why did Bush keep drinking out of an empty glass? He already looked bad enough; give the poor schmuck a refill.

3. Kerry said "back door draft". Heh heh.

4. Bush said "double duty". Heh heh.

5. Laura Bush and Teresa were wearing the same suit (not at the same time, but you know). Except that Teresa's had a more modern collar. And by "modern" I mean... odd.

6. What was up with the Kerrys' long, disgusting kiss at the end? Get a room.

7. Tom Brokaw looked like he had 'rhoids the way he kept shifting in his seat. Poor guy.

8. I have decided that Laura Bush is a robot. That would make the Bush girls half robot.

9. I have to applaud Kerry on his ability to say "nuclear proliferation". Try saying that 5 times fast. See? That's why you aren't running for president.

10. Two words: mexed missages. Good one, W.

Love, Fluffy